“You have to find them deficient in some way compared to you.” Passing on sex was nothing compared to shutting down what really matters to Harper: her shit-talking. “You always do this with certain people,” Ethan tells her, deflating her glee. Speaking of, Harper is quick to pivot this conversation to bring up the “we don’t fight” revelation, deeming it a marker that their perfect life is really bogus. They don’t seem to be in any rush to remedy this problem (Ethan passes on her offer to finish the job), but maybe that’ll change after a week of comparing themselves to Cameron and Daphne. He prefers the morning she prefers night. She’s mildly offended that he didn’t just wait for her so they could have sex, but only barely, because it seems like no secret that they aren’t in sync in this department. Harper finds this preposterous, and we can practically see her tuck this nugget away to gleefully report to Ethan back in the room - but when she gets there, she finds him jerking off post-run.

He ends up taking a call, screaming into the phone about his missing luggage, but Daphne assures Harper that she’s never on the receiving end of that rage, telling her, “We never fight.” Harper, meanwhile, finds herself solo while Ethan is on an early-morning run, until Daphne and Cameron beckon her over to their table.

A much kinder Greg than we saw last week indulges Tanya in her fantasy Sicily day - “Whatever you want it’s your day to shine,” he tells her - though it’s unclear if this day includes the Oreo-cookie cake she requested for breakfast. The Di Grasso clan effectively adopt Portia, inviting her to walk to the Greek theater with them. Our second day at the White Lotus begins as our guests plan their itineraries over the breakfast buffet. This notion of emasculation - or more broadly, who wields the power in these relationships - is a thread that runs throughout “Italian Dream.” Who’s wearing the (designer) pants, and what implications does that have? “I think some women cut off their husband’s balls and then they wonder why they’re not attracted to them anymore,” Daphne says, speculating to her husband about the relationship dynamic of their travel companions, Harper and Ethan. But this week, focus seems to be on cutting off a different body part. Last week, we were introduced to the Sicilian legend of “Teste di Moro,” about a woman scorned who beheaded her duplicitous lover.

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